Sunday, November 22, 2009

Back to my being myself.. 21 post number 3!!

Gangothri was a fun place, a small school where in you easily get a lot of attention whether you demand it or not. Everyone knew everyone else kinda place. Few things that i still remember about Gangothri include my first picnic, I went on my first picnic when i was in 2nd or 3rd i guess. We were taken to Malampuzha dam and Fantasy park. Malampuzha dam is a beautiful place, and the dam is humongous. I have been there quite many times but offlate I never had the opportunity to go there and see what it is like now. Probably next time i go to Palakkad I should make a list for myself on the things I have been missing out there and work on narrowing down the list. Fantasy park was one among the better parks then, it had some very good rides, I really dunno about how it is now cause the last time we tried visiting Fantasy park some 8 years ago or so it was shutdown due to some union problem, sigh this union concept sucks at times.

The next and one of the most memorable thing was the celebreation of our 50th year of Independence it was back in 1997. There was a small feast and some programs organized by the school then and I went for it. I wished that I could live long enough to see the 100th year of Indian Independence, not knowing how unstable the world is and how unassured our lifes are. I would never forget that day in my life, I guess we had some small debates on the people who suffered for us, the peopke who were harassed by the British, the JalianWala Bagh Massacre, and our Bhagath Singh and Subash Chendra Bose. Yeah I adored them, the extremists and I still believe it was not just Ghandiji's efforts that freed us from the clutches of the British. I even hoped Subash Chandra Bose never died in the Plane crash and that he lived somewhere and I could meet him one day. I was not a great fan of Ghandiji till last year or so when my dad really made me understand what a good person he really was.

Mummy used to teach me back then, she would sit with me and make me learn everything, do the homework and she learnt bits and pieces of Hindi to teach me Hindi. She would pinch me, beat me up and I would cry clamorously in an attemp to get someone by my side and escape the studies part. Like most of the kids then even I hated to study, I would look at the people who would be playing in the ground and wished that I could be there with them enjoying, but she never let me, if not for that care and effort she out then I wouldn't be half as good as my present self, I would have never been able to be what I am now, not that am good but I know am capable, and all credits to her.

I studied at Gangothri from my 2nd to 4th standard and 1 week of my 5th standrad. It so happened to be a cliche that Nimmy was missing in the 5th standrad class, I was definitely disappointed. I just told my friends that even I would be changing the school and it so coincidentially happened that way, my dad wanted me to study in a better school infact the best school in that part of the world then, so thanks to Pappa, what I said actually happened, he has always been like that. And so my world at Gangothri came to a halt and the rest of that phase of my life had to be at Chinmaya Vidhyalaya Pallavur, a school with a really long history and a really good one. Chinmaya was a big world for me, lot bigger than Gangothri. I started getting used to the 7km journey in bus everyday, made loads of new friends in the bus, had a greater exposure to what it is like outside Nemmara. It was fun, and for me everything in my life has been fun lol :).

I am not really sure how much of my life at Chinmaya do I remember. I was among the younger ones in the bus then and hence my seniors would give that extra care for you. We used to sit together in the last seat of the bus, its usually a long one capable of seating atleast 6 of us. We would keep talking about stuffs and go. One advantage was that we had to pay only 1/4th of the usual ticket rate in private buses. But there used to be certain conductors who never let us get in the bus early and would want us to wait till they were about to start the bus from the stand and wouldn't let us sit even if we found vacant seats. They used to treat students in the most pathetic manner possible. But yeah it was their job and we had to suffer.

We had a good cricket ground in the school. I used to play decent cricket then, it was always fun cause every game we played end with controversies :). Chinmaya school had a lot of beautiful girls, most of them were pretty. hehe.

And I remember this incident. Once few of us, I mean guys were called by our Class teacher to the staff room and she was like "who among you wrote that paper and kept it under Lakshmi's(named changed cause I don't remember :P) table". We were like, "What is that paper all about?" and she showed us one, It said "I loved you". We were shocked, and then she said thet she knew one of us did it cause she checked our handwriting with the one in the paper and it matched to some extend. I don't remember how good that girl looked but I never did that and it was the same all of us cause we never did something like that. She kept nagging us saying if we don't say who did it she would call our parents and suspend us and all that. We pleaded innocent and no action was taken for sometime cause she found that the incident didn't happen again. But few days later it again happened and this time the culprit was caught, I really don't how they caught her. But it was found that one of that perticular girls friend, I guess her neighbour named "Neethu"(I have a faint clue that her name was neethu) only did this. Girls can be a pain in the ass right.. :P

This is another incident that happened in Chinmaya, we found that many of the students lost their money that they had kept in their bags for quite sometime. This time again the teacher was suspicious about a few people but thankfully i wasn't there in the list. It was found that the stealer was not just fond of money but also chocolates. She gave a warning for the whole class saying its better if the one who did the crime goes to her and accepts his indulgence cause she had found out that who did it. The next day one of our friends, stood in front of the class and said that it was he who stole everything, she asked him to handover all the money that he stole from us and he did just that. But no one really isolated him despite that incident, everytime i go to Nemmara i end up meeting him somewhere, he is a pretty nice guy.

We had a computer sir who used to be very harsh with students. I later came to know that this guy went to a computer center and learnt stuffs and taught the same thing to us in the classes and that he was one of my very distant relatives.. :P.. What a pity..

Monday, November 2, 2009

What do i do next??

Hey guys am back after a great break. Hope all of you are doing really great. :)

What do i blog about today? Well, not the continuation of my earlier post anyway its just a sort of confusion on what i should do next.
I am into my final year of engineering(Yipeeee!!!), 3 years went so fast and now just another year to go. I wonder what i should do next, i got this inclination towards finance and the working of money which urges me to to my MBA in finance from one of the top colleges(if at all i get into :)) and yeah i am working on CAT(Common Admission Test) to get into the premier B-schools in our country, but these days i have developed an affinity towards the latest technologies that have been developed in computer science and related fields. This is what confuses me the most, right from the day when my staff members started warning us about the final year projects we are suppose to submit next semester i have been thinking and thinking about what i should go for next?

The problem is in here, if i were to do a good project all by myself and not going to any of these so called project-centers i will have to start working on my computational skills, all those programming concepts in Java and php and python and perl and what not!!! No am not proud to say that am bad when it comes to programming really bad!! :(. Its not only me actually, if i were to go statistically then only 8% (approx.) of the engineering graduates are eligible to be (quality)engineers with the skills they possess. I am among the rest 92% of them who are not suppose to complain of not getting a job just because i haven't put to use these 3 years of my life, so its high time i start and try getting into that elite crew of nearly 2% who understand that they are no where and so in a hurry to put to use these final 6-8 months of our so called college life to best effect and learn some computational skills and get some value for our money.

And what project do i do is the next question..
I got the answer, i searched here and there and found out that cloud computing is the next generation computing environment and so i should probably work on that. I know the word sounds so familiar for most of us , its a cloud and computing but not all of us know the meaning lol. Even i didn't know about it the first time i heard the term, i had to google it. Thanks to Sergy Brin and Larry Page, if not for google i wouldn't be doing any of these.

But now i find that the topic that i want to work on in cloud computing is way beyond an engineering project and is something like a doctorate topic, and i am not ready to spent 4-5 years of my life getting a doctorate and working on all that. So for now i have decided that i would go to some bloody project centers and do some useless work and all that the project can do is to get me a decent percentage and add to my already not-that-decent-aggregate. I am so damn confused and confused to the core. I have decided to stick to my ambitions of doing my MBA and then being an entrepreneur, now here again i got problems lol.

I am writing my CAT and XAT this year, my preparations were going good till i guess September and it took a U-turn then. Since then i have not been preparing that good nor have been attending the classes properly. So i had to keep my Plan B that was to give my best shot at these exams this year and if i don't get into the premier institutes i will work on it again for another year and give a better shot in fact my final try at it.

What would i do after my final year till the next MBA admission was the next question in front of me, for this i have a good solution thanks to all the parttime jobs and man power that i have been doing i am confident that i can earn some good money and also get some contacts during that phase and also sharpen my English skills by joining the British Council English Classes and also explore North India and also meet all my friends :). But here the problem is that Pappa and Mummy wants me to go abroad and study and also work somewhere there which am least interested in doing. Mummy still says that my astrologer predicted that i would go abroad and study duh, i clearly say a NO for this.

On top of all this my 7th semester exams are starting this Friday i.e Nov 6th and am zero in all the subjects. This time around i have got lesser marks in all my internals and also in one of the practicals as well and so to maintain that not-so-decent-percentage i think i need to strive a little harder and am not up for this. I am so damn lethargic that i wasted more that 3 weeks of my study holidays doing things that never helped me. :(. Am such a dumb ass.. :(

On a whole the most confusing post in my 2 long years of blogging i guess. I think this phase is something that most people go through these days but i am just not able to digest the fact that things are not just happening at this point of time. Lets see. Pray for all of us who are confused and in their final years. :)